Tuesday, January 26, 2010

Happiness

I feel as though I've been neglectful of my writing blog. Maybe I have, maybe I haven't. Birthday parties, video premieres and family have just gotten in the way of doing everything that I want to do. But I'm still managing to write--but not on this blog.

I've had some awesome plot twists for my zombie werewolf book. I mean amazing and it's mapped into a trilogy. All of my novels have series potential, but this one is the first one where I know what's going to happen in each book. Each book has its own mini arc that fits into the overall arc of the series. I'm so excited to write it, and I feel like my dystopian novel is just standing in my way.

Onward and upward. In my search for the perfect agent (think the dream I mentioned last week), I've managed to find a few new agents that I must query. Really cool blogs and interviews. I'm super excited, but I'm putting my query letter through the ringer yet again. Maybe someday I'll get it right.

I often wonder why I didn't go into publishing. I always wanted to write, but I decided to be an English teacher since it was more stable and would work well if I had to work once I had kids. I taught for a very short amount of time, and don't ever want to teach again. Nope! I admire all the teachers that have stuck with it, but I'm one of those that burned out in the first five years. When I go to conferences and listen to the editors and the agents talk, i wonder to myself why I didn't even put that option on the table. I love to read, I can pinpoint what's good and bad in a story, and yeah i'd need some practice, and definitely industry contacts, but I feel like I'd fit in. Basically all I think about are books.


Anyway enough of my random musing. I hope you all have happy writing and sunshine this week!

Friday, January 22, 2010

Friday Five: Smooth Sailing? Yeah Right!

1. Tonight hubby and I are going to see Avatar together at the iMax. While the movie looks AMAZING, I'm a little bit worried. Rob loves 3-D. I don't. Really I've not seen movies that I've wanted to (okay kind of wanted to) because they are in 3-D. My eyes are funny and about fifteen minutes in they stop seeing a 3-D image and I get a blurred double image and a massive headache. Rob convinced me that the technology had improved, told me that we'd sit at the perfect point in the theater (which involves getting there more than an hour early) and to just relax and it will work. Then he bought the tickets. Two days later he told me that you can watch it in 2-D because that's how Leo LaPorte (Rob listens to TWIT a lot) watched it since he doesn't like 3-D either. Nice--thanks for letting me know. So I'm hoping that it won't go wonky on me this time. I mean the film looks amazing, I just don't want the headache that I'm almost certain is coming.

2. Writing makes me happy. Writing and making money makes me happy, but it doesn't stop me from burn out. Right now I'm totally suffering from burnout when it comes to my job writing. I wish that I din't have to do it, while I'm extremely grateful that I can do it at home with my kiddies around me (who also make it extremely difficult to get things done). It's not easy being a Work at Home Mom. Nope.

3. Last night I had a dream about finding an agent. It was truly bizarre and involved massive amounts of sweets, hiding from the police and secret interviews. I woke up with the distinct feeling that there is the perfect agent out there for me (in the dream it was a he) and that he would totally get where I want my work to go and everything like that. Totally bizarre, but I keep thinking that I've got do searches and figure out who this person is. I've got random clues, but I'm almost positive it is a just a mishmash of all the agents that I've been researching lately.

4. This weekend is the last birthday party for all the craziness that happens in our family. Then it is smooth sailing until next December. I love that. It makes me happy that I don't have to do that normally.

5. There was a beautiful day on Wednesday. So nice I turned the heat off. But now it is just icky out and gray and so I'm just dragging around the house. But things will look up. Next week should be sunny!

Friday, January 15, 2010

Friday Five: Tripping Up

1. Okay in the last few days I've tripped more times than I can count on both of my hands. The funny thing is that the house is actually fairly clean. Yesterday my boys laughed at me hysterically as I overcompensated and went down backwards. I landed in a laundry basket and hurt my back. I go through these ultra klutzy phases in my life. The worst was my freshman year of college, truly bad, so the past few days are nothing compared to that, but I do wonder why I do that. Why do I trip so much in one period of time and then not at all for years at a time.

2. The charlie horse of all charlie horses. So I never had a charlie horse until I was pregnant (and no I'm not pregnant--nor planning on being any time soon) and they got worse with each pregnancy. The sudden pain would wake me up screaming in the middle of the night, and poor Rob would look startled and hit my leg for me. (That really did help.) Last night I got the worst one I've ever had. It was so bad I woke up screaming and slid out of bed, jumping up and down. I seriously couldn't move my leg. Rob slept through it, but I did wake up both of my boys. The thing is it is still killing me. That's not normal for me. I've done everything I can think of, including massage, a hot bath, and ibuprofen and nothing is working. It hurts to walk, and the wrong movement will set off another round of spasms, but since I'm awake, I manage not to scream.

3. We are off on another round of birthdays for my kids. The two boys are in the next week. They are six days apart. I was starting to worry that they might share the same birthday when Jacob was late. But every one of my kids were late, and I managed to talk the doctor not to set my inducement date for Caleb's birthday. Fortunately Jacob came even earlier than that. But the birthday party fun is on!

4. Potty training is no fun. Not for mom. Jacob has decided he is too big for diapers, but doesn't seem to care when he is wet. I know he can do it, since I can take him on errands that take several hours and he stays dry. But at home it's a crapshoot if he will be dry in the thirty minutes between times that I make him try. I just don't get it.

5. I need to get on schedule, I need to get motivated. This week is the week. Or maybe it will be next week.

Happy Writing!

Monday, January 11, 2010

I Found My Pages

Today I found my missing notebook. I was so very excited, but I didn't have a chance to read what I had written, so it may not be as wonderful as I thought it was. My main point is though I found the pages, and so I haven't lost the voice that woke me up in the middle of the night. I really, really, really want to write this story, but Selena needs me to finish her amazing adventure first.

Self doubt is such a killer. I really range back and forth wildly between extreme self confidence ( I am an awesome writer, and I know it) to extreme self doubt (I totally suck, and when I don't acknowledge that I'm being completely self delusional). Fortunately for most people I keep all of this to myself. Poor Rob sometimes hears my complaints, but I can tell he is just putting up with me or he thinks I'm fishing for compliments and reassurance.

Ultimately though, writing is something that I've decided I want to do. And not just freelance writing. I want to be a novelist, and so I'm going to swing back and forth between confidence and lack of confidence. I honestly don't know if that will ever go away, even after I'm published. All i can do is write, and work hard at revisions and then write some more.

How do you deal with your lack of self confidence on your tough days?

Friday, January 8, 2010

Friday Five: The Snow that Never Was!

1. Today schools started two hours late due to a snow forecast that didn't materialize. When I went to bed last night I didn't expect it to, but I was disappointed. I'm not going to lie, one good snowfall would be nice. I'm not missing snow the way I used to, but I figure if it's going to be cold, there might as well be white stuff on the ground. Next week it should get back up to the the fifties, normal for this time of year.

2. This morning my daughter wanted to take her iPod to school. She's in second grade (and it's a shuffle), and the school says not to take it to school. She got it for Christmas from Santa. The school says she shouldn't have it, and she promised she wouldn't listen to it on the bus, but she doesn't have a locker to put it in, and I just don't think it's a good idea. Today was a battle of wills. She refused to get on the bus without it. And so she lost her iPod for two weeks, the t.v. for two weeks, and computer privileges for two weeks. She kept telling me to ground her from reading, but I don't think so.

3. I love finding great books to read. New ones that make me happy, and I'm equally disappointed when one doesn't quite live up to my expectations. That's why I like reading books that I find rather than seeing all of the hype and excitement and then not liking a book. A book I read last night was one with a lot of hype, and I went into it expecting a bit too much. It was a good book, and I would have come out of reading it happy, except it had all the hype and so I was expecting more. It's kind of disappointing.

4. I killed my character yesterday. It made me sad. Not crying sad, but sad. I may have to invent a new world to put him into. Maybe he'll be reincarnated in another book series. It's sad, but he had to die, and now my novel is going to pick up pace and hopefully gallop onto the end.

5. Separately this week each of my three children have come to me and mentioned their current career choice. My daughter often fluctuates between singer, artist, teacher and doctor. This week it's a doctor, because she wants to make more money. My four year old son decided on being a dentist, because they make a lot of money. My two year old asked for a rocket ship and told me that he wanted to fly in them when he's grown up, and so he wants to be an astronaut. Maybe they'll be able to take care of me someday, either way I'd better start really saving for college. They've all got long roads ahead of them!

Thursday, January 7, 2010

Contest for Critiques and Signed Book

The Shooting Stars blog is offering you the chance to win a query critique, first five pages critique or a signed copy of The Dark Divine by Bree Despain. (A werewolf book, which I do own due to my current werewolf kick, and I enjoyed.)

Anyway the contest is great, because who couldn't use another set of eyes on their work.

Check out the contest here.

Wednesday, January 6, 2010

Why I Don't Write on Paper

So I had an inspiration in the middle of the night while I was staying at my in-laws. So I got up and jotted it down in my brand new notebook. I think it was yellow. It may not have been. It was actually the beginning of the werewolf/zombie novel and I woke up with the MC voice just going through my head. I got it down, wrote for about fifteen minutes, and then put it back in my bag.

So I decide I want to read it today. Can I find it? No. The answer is no. I have no idea where the notebook is. i've looked everywhere and did a massive cleaning of my house yesterday and so I know it isn't hiding somewhere mysteriously and it's gone.

I emailed my hsuband and his response:
I don't ever use letter-sized notebooks. Sorry. I haven't seen it. I didn't know you wrote in notebooks as opposed to typing (with auto backups, etc.)

I hope you find it.

--Rob


Yeah, that's why. I've got auto back up of my writing to the cloud and to time machine (which wouldn't have worked at home). But now I'm just so frustrated. Granted it's not much, and I can slightly remember what I wrote, but I'm worried I'm going to lose that voice. Yikes!


And I'm feeling stuck in my current WIP because I have to kill a character I like. It's a big deal to the plot. Huge, it helps to make my character move forward. It needs to be someone she likes, but I'd rather kill the little brother than the big one, because I like him better. Unfortunately it just doesn't work for the plot. So I'm very, very sad, but he's going to die tonight.

Happy Writing!